One in the Eye

This wine called to me, pulled me in. Strange, because the label's a bit naff, but it all made sense once I'd spun the bottle.

Last year, an encounter with a date palm nearly cost me an eye. Click here for details. Sitting endless hours in waiting rooms, waiting on specialists, a lot goes through your mind. One thing I wondered, was what to do if my eye was done for? Some sort of prosthetic number? Dark glasses? Live with the hole? Eventually I settled on a patch.

So ahead of this year's London Fashion Week, looking to play along and make a bit of impact, I decided to have a shot at making something...

In the end I didn't wear it. The Swarovski crystal was attached via a giant spike. One accidental nudge and an inch of steel would plunge straight into my retina. Of course it didn't matter, fashion being fashion, I'd have been seriously trumped...

Patches off to 'Niyi Maximus (he wears the) Crown'

The wine's pretty special for £9.99. Even if, from the back of the label, it looks like the guy who makes it is a bit 'special' too. I bought my bottle from The Cave on Great Western Road.